1984.07.23 The Brawl to End It All at MSG
Jul 17, 2016 20:20:53 GMT -5
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Post by Shatter Machine on Jul 17, 2016 20:20:53 GMT -5
The Brawl to End It All
1984.07.23
From Madison Square Garden
Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund are on commentary
Sika
Vs
Ron Shaw
I fucking hate Gene Okerlund on commentary. He’s just awful. Amazing at what he would become known for, but just awful calling matches. They announce Sika as “Samoan Number Two, Sika”. Did he lose some kind of bet? Couldn’t he just have been announced as half of the Samoans tag team? Shaw is just as heelish as he can be, but his mannerisms are really over-exaggerated. He’s most well known as the jobber that David Sammartino submitted to during a squash match in 1985, trying to get himself fired. While I research this, Sika no-sells a headbutt, then hits a shitty forearm and a falling headbutt for the win at 5:03. DUD.
Tony Garea
Vs
The Iron Sheik (with Fred Blassie)
I haven’t seen a lot of Garea in the ring, but I did have the chance to meet him when he was a road agent. Seemed like a nice guy who was happy to be recognized. Garea grabs a headlock, and they work a couple of punches and a slam around it. He gets a sunset flip for 2, then goes back to the headlock on the mat. Sheik shoots him off and goes for a boot, but Tony catches it and atomic drops him, then goes back to the goddamn headlock. The fans chant “USA” at someone (I don’t know who, Garea is from New Zealand, Sheik is from Iran. Maybe the referee?) Sheik catches him with a boot, but puts his head down early and Garea kicks him and runs him to the buckle. Dropkick and a high cross, but that doesn’t even get 1. Sheik sends him chest-first to the corner, then kills him dead with a German suplex for the pin at 5:56. Good match. * ½
WWF Intercontinental Championship:
Tito Santana (Champion)
Vs
Bob Orton, Jr.
They announce that the time limit is only 20 minutes, so I’m sensing a 20-minute draw here. He starts with an armdrag into an armbar. Yup. They’re killing time. Orton backs him into the corner, but Tito takes him down, so Orton bails out to the apron. They fight over an overhand wristlock, and I notice for the first time how much Randy Orton looks like Bob. They struggle a bit, and Orton uses the hair to take Tito down. He drives a knee to the ribs, and a punch gets 2. Tito dodges a charge, and Orton goes right to the post. Tito kicks him, then hits a punch from the second rope. Tito stomps him in the corner, then he starts working the arm-wringer. He grabs the armbar, and this is like a clinic on how to do a 20-minute draw. Orton gets to the ropes, forcing the break. Tito gets a leapfrog, but Orton just levels him with a punch. He starts pounding him, but Tito is out of position for the kneedrop. Running powerslam gets 2. Orton starts dropping knees to the back, and the fans start coming alive to support Tito. Backbreaker gets 2. Tito hits a punch, and Orton goes down. He starts connecting, but Orton cuts him off by raking the eyes. Orton gets a cradle suplex for 2, then he goes to chinlock. Tito comes back, but Orton gets him with a boot to the gut. Forearm to the head gets 2. Slam, and Orton goes up, but Tito gets his knees up on a pump splash. Tito fires off on him, running him to the buckles. Big kneedrop gets 2. He runs Orton’s head to the mat for 2. Orton hits him in the throat to put that to an end, but Santana grabs an abdominal stretch, but Orton reverses it. Tito hiplocks out of it, then hits a forearm. Orton hits a back suplex for 2. He tries for a vertical suplex, but Tito gets an inside cradle for 2. Orton ducks the flying forearm and drops a knee for 2. Santana sends him into the ringpost over the top turnbuckle, then gets a rollup for 2. They start duking it out on the mat, then Tito backdrops out of a piledriver. Knee to the face, then another. Mounted punches in the corner by Tito, but Orton gets an atomic drop from there. Orton drops a series of elbows, but Tito gets a fist up, but the bell rings for the time limit at 20:00. Good match. They start brawling after the bell, but it’s a time-limit draw. Somewhat slow, but really good. ***
Bob Backlund
Vs
Butcher Vachon
I’ve never seen Butcher Vachon wrestle, ever. This is Backlund’s last match in the WWF until 1992. Vachon is really out of shape, and even Gorilla and Mean Gene comment on it. Vachon grabs an overhand wristlock, but they go to the ropes. Backlund sweeps his ankle, but Vachon starts punching and chopping. He works him over in the corner, but Backlund grabs him and slams him. HE PROCURES THE CROSSFACE CHICKENWING! It’s over at 2:24. ¼ *
Gene Okerlund talks to tonight’s WWF World Title challenger, Greg Valentine, and the champion, Hulk Hogan, who is in all white tonight.
WWF World Heavyweight Championship:
Hulk Hogan (Champion)
Vs
Greg Valentine (with Capt. Lou Albano)
Hogan is still using “Eye of the Tiger”, and holy shit is he A) over and B) JACKED. Valentine jumps him at the bell, but Hogan won’t have it. Valentine bumps all over for him, but they just can’t get it together. Slam, and an elbow by Hogan. He grabs a reverse chinlock, then goes to a rear chinlock, then to a side headlock. Valentine hits a back suplex out of that, and it looks like this is going to be abbreviated for one reason another. Probably the match that is going to be broadcast on MTV. He goes to a reverse chinlock, but Hogan powers right out of it, running him into the corner. Valentine takes him down with forearms, then drops one on him for 2. He gets a body ride, but Hogan gets his knees up. God, Okerlund is terrible. “Valentine hurt his knee!” They struggle over a suplex, with Hogan getting it. Hogan with a shoulder breaker, then a boot, and Valentine falls to the floor. They brawl there, with Hogan getting an atomic drop. I swear to God, if Okerlund says that Hogan weighs 302 pounds again, I’m going strangle myself with my phone charger. Valentine grabs a chinlock on the inside, and Hogan’s arm falls twice, but he fights up. They go back to the floor, and Valentine hits his knee with a chair, but a fan grabs it, so he throws it into the crowd, and grabs another. Valentine starts softening him up for the Figure Four, but Hogan kicks him away a couple of times. Second rope elbow gets 2 for Valentine. He goes up, but Hogan has started to Hulk up, so when Valentine comes off, Hogan clotheslines him and drops the leg for the pin at 10:24. Nothing offensive, and since Hogan had been champion for six months, totally non-formula, because there was no formula. **
WWF World Martial Arts Heavyweight Championship:
Antonio Inoki (champion)
Vs
Charlie Fulton
Inoki is really, really spry at this point in his life, and was probably one of the twenty best wrestlers in the world. He takes Fulton down a few times, and there’s something just inherently wrong with Gene Okerlund calling an Inoki match. Fulton gets some offense in, including a near-fall. He goes to a chinlock, but it’s more of a choke. The ref forces a break, and Inoki gets annoyed and kicks the shit out of him, finishing with the enziguiri for the pin at 3:50. Well, that was quick. *
WWF World Tag Team Championship:
Dick Murdoch & Adrian Adonis (Champions)
Vs
Sgt. Slaughter & Pvt. Terry Daniels
Adonis was such an amazing worker; he just couldn’t keep his weight under control. Murdoch was a pretty good hand, as well, but he was another one who didn’t give a shit what he looked like. Daniels gets a shot at a bit of a shine, working an armbar and getting a takedown or two. Murdoch catches him with a knee to the stomach, but both guys tag out. Slaughter gets a pop to rival Hogan’s. I’ll never understand why he left the company in late-’84 or early ’85. He could have made so much more. Adonis has run out of fucks to give, and is chewing gum in the ring. Daniels controls Adonis briefly, and when Adonis tags in Murdoch, Daniels gets an armdrag and armbar. Gorilla and Gene are really putting over how much Daniels has improved in the last six months. They work in some high spots (including Murdoch with a fucking leapfrog), but eventually Dick takes control. It doesn’t last, as Daniels gets his knees up on a charge and gets another armdrag and armbar. Adonis comes in and gets armdragged as well. Adonis gets a couple of leapfrogs, then a back elbow, but Daniels gets another armbar. Slaughter comes in, and he pounds on Murdoch. Nice spot, as Slaughter puts Daniels on his shoulder then uses the added weight to drop a knee on Murdoch. I like that. Daniels gets an abdominal stretch. Murdoch hip tosses out of it, and they finally get a heat segment on Daniels. Huge powerslam by Adonis. Murdoch gets a hanging armbar, and they cut the ring in half really well to work over Daniels. The heat isn’t long, and Slaughter makes the hot tag. He takes on both guys and after nailing Adonis with the clothesline he locks in the Cobra Clutch. It all breaks down, and Daniels hits a cross body for 2 on Adonis. The ref puts Slaughter out, and Adonis holds Daniels while Murdoch drops a knee to the throat for the pin at 17:16 to retain the titles. Not terrible, and they avoided the face-in-peril formula. ** ¾
WWF Women’s Championship:
The Fabulous Moolah (Champion, with Capt. Lou Albano)
Vs
Wendi Richter (with Cyndi Lauper and David Wolff)
This is essentially a paint-by-numbers Moolah vs anyone she’s ever trained match. Lots of hair whips and a shit like that. It’s really boring, and Moolah is just completely incapable of taking very much of a bump at this point, but she gets caught in the ropes, so Wendi kicks the crap out of her. It takes forever to get her free, and Wendi grabs a full nelson. They tease Cyndi hitting Moolah, and she eventually does. Richter hits a dropkick for 2. Suplex/slam for 2. Backbreaker for 2. Moolah takes back over, and gets a monkey flip for 2. Backdrop gets 2. This is so bad. Moolah pulls her up. Moolah holds her for Albano to hit her, but they totally blow the spot. They go to the worst finish ever, as Moolah does something that vaguely resembles a belly-to-back suplex, but Richter rolls her shoulder at 2 to win the title at 11:20. That was not only bad, it was actively offensive. -***
Gene Okerlund interviews Cyndi and Wendi. Wendi still sounds like Mongo McMichael on helium.
Paul Orndorff
Vs
Chief Jay Strongbow
Always wondered what the big deal was about Strongbow. He was a poor man’s Wahoo McDaniel, and wasn’t particularly strong in the ring. People loved him in the Northeast, though. Kind of like Pedro Morales. Orndorff stalls like crazy after the bell rings. He irritates the shit out of everyone. He takes forever to take his robe off, then to put his elbow pads on. They do some basic stuff and Strongbow grabs a sleeper. Orndorff dumps him over the top. Orndorff pounds on him, but Strongbow no-sells that, hitting chops and kneelifts. Orndorff hits a clothesline for the pin out of nowhere at 6:05. There was about 2 minutes of actual contact. DUD.
Afa
Vs
Rene Goulet
This will be quick. Goulet takes his time getting his gear off, and Afa mauls him. Goulet puts on his loaded glove, but Afa shrugs it off in pretty short order and pummels him more. Goulet gets a clawhold, but Afa escapes with headbutts and finishes him with a Samoan Drop at 3:43. ¼ *
Howard Finkel announces the card for August 25, 1984 at MSG. Looks like a pretty loaded card.
Battle Royal: Sika, Jose Luis Rivera, Butcher Vachon, Antonio Inoki, Tony Garea, Jay Strongbow, Afa, Steve Lombardi, Dick Murdoch, Bob Orton, Adrian Adonis, Rene Goulet, Ron Shaw, Charlie Fulton, Terry Daniels, The Iron Sheik, Tito Santana, Paul Orndorff, Sgt. Slaughter, and Samula
It’s a clusterfuck, because that’s what battle royals are. Lombardi is eliminated by Slaughter. Orndorff is dumped by Santana and Afa. Iron Sheik almost dumps Slaughter, but Daniels makes the save. Strongbow is eliminated. Sheik and Vachon have been eliminated and this camera work is really shitty. Santana eliminates Adonis, who tries to get back in. Slaughter dumps Charlie Fulton. Somehow, Adonis hasn’t been eliminated, so Inoki kicks him in the face. Murdoch, Adonis, and Slaughter all get eliminated at the same time, and we’re down to about ten. Afa gets dumped. Tito gets dumped by Inoki, and Sika is gone as well. Rivera goes too. Inoki backdrops Samula out. It’s Inoki, Garea, Goulet, Shaw, and Orton. Inoki nails Orton with an enziguiri, and he tumbles to the apron and floor. Shaw and Goulet dump Garea, and the jobbers team up against Inoki. Goulet accidentally nails Shaw, eliminating him, and Inoki tosses Goulet to win it. At 13:23. That was a disjointed mess that was impossible to follow because guys kept going in and out. DUD.
The Bottom Line: This was an MSG card with a name on it. Don’t bother. Thumbs down.
1984.07.23
From Madison Square Garden
Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund are on commentary
Sika
Vs
Ron Shaw
I fucking hate Gene Okerlund on commentary. He’s just awful. Amazing at what he would become known for, but just awful calling matches. They announce Sika as “Samoan Number Two, Sika”. Did he lose some kind of bet? Couldn’t he just have been announced as half of the Samoans tag team? Shaw is just as heelish as he can be, but his mannerisms are really over-exaggerated. He’s most well known as the jobber that David Sammartino submitted to during a squash match in 1985, trying to get himself fired. While I research this, Sika no-sells a headbutt, then hits a shitty forearm and a falling headbutt for the win at 5:03. DUD.
Tony Garea
Vs
The Iron Sheik (with Fred Blassie)
I haven’t seen a lot of Garea in the ring, but I did have the chance to meet him when he was a road agent. Seemed like a nice guy who was happy to be recognized. Garea grabs a headlock, and they work a couple of punches and a slam around it. He gets a sunset flip for 2, then goes back to the headlock on the mat. Sheik shoots him off and goes for a boot, but Tony catches it and atomic drops him, then goes back to the goddamn headlock. The fans chant “USA” at someone (I don’t know who, Garea is from New Zealand, Sheik is from Iran. Maybe the referee?) Sheik catches him with a boot, but puts his head down early and Garea kicks him and runs him to the buckle. Dropkick and a high cross, but that doesn’t even get 1. Sheik sends him chest-first to the corner, then kills him dead with a German suplex for the pin at 5:56. Good match. * ½
WWF Intercontinental Championship:
Tito Santana (Champion)
Vs
Bob Orton, Jr.
They announce that the time limit is only 20 minutes, so I’m sensing a 20-minute draw here. He starts with an armdrag into an armbar. Yup. They’re killing time. Orton backs him into the corner, but Tito takes him down, so Orton bails out to the apron. They fight over an overhand wristlock, and I notice for the first time how much Randy Orton looks like Bob. They struggle a bit, and Orton uses the hair to take Tito down. He drives a knee to the ribs, and a punch gets 2. Tito dodges a charge, and Orton goes right to the post. Tito kicks him, then hits a punch from the second rope. Tito stomps him in the corner, then he starts working the arm-wringer. He grabs the armbar, and this is like a clinic on how to do a 20-minute draw. Orton gets to the ropes, forcing the break. Tito gets a leapfrog, but Orton just levels him with a punch. He starts pounding him, but Tito is out of position for the kneedrop. Running powerslam gets 2. Orton starts dropping knees to the back, and the fans start coming alive to support Tito. Backbreaker gets 2. Tito hits a punch, and Orton goes down. He starts connecting, but Orton cuts him off by raking the eyes. Orton gets a cradle suplex for 2, then he goes to chinlock. Tito comes back, but Orton gets him with a boot to the gut. Forearm to the head gets 2. Slam, and Orton goes up, but Tito gets his knees up on a pump splash. Tito fires off on him, running him to the buckles. Big kneedrop gets 2. He runs Orton’s head to the mat for 2. Orton hits him in the throat to put that to an end, but Santana grabs an abdominal stretch, but Orton reverses it. Tito hiplocks out of it, then hits a forearm. Orton hits a back suplex for 2. He tries for a vertical suplex, but Tito gets an inside cradle for 2. Orton ducks the flying forearm and drops a knee for 2. Santana sends him into the ringpost over the top turnbuckle, then gets a rollup for 2. They start duking it out on the mat, then Tito backdrops out of a piledriver. Knee to the face, then another. Mounted punches in the corner by Tito, but Orton gets an atomic drop from there. Orton drops a series of elbows, but Tito gets a fist up, but the bell rings for the time limit at 20:00. Good match. They start brawling after the bell, but it’s a time-limit draw. Somewhat slow, but really good. ***
Bob Backlund
Vs
Butcher Vachon
I’ve never seen Butcher Vachon wrestle, ever. This is Backlund’s last match in the WWF until 1992. Vachon is really out of shape, and even Gorilla and Mean Gene comment on it. Vachon grabs an overhand wristlock, but they go to the ropes. Backlund sweeps his ankle, but Vachon starts punching and chopping. He works him over in the corner, but Backlund grabs him and slams him. HE PROCURES THE CROSSFACE CHICKENWING! It’s over at 2:24. ¼ *
Gene Okerlund talks to tonight’s WWF World Title challenger, Greg Valentine, and the champion, Hulk Hogan, who is in all white tonight.
WWF World Heavyweight Championship:
Hulk Hogan (Champion)
Vs
Greg Valentine (with Capt. Lou Albano)
Hogan is still using “Eye of the Tiger”, and holy shit is he A) over and B) JACKED. Valentine jumps him at the bell, but Hogan won’t have it. Valentine bumps all over for him, but they just can’t get it together. Slam, and an elbow by Hogan. He grabs a reverse chinlock, then goes to a rear chinlock, then to a side headlock. Valentine hits a back suplex out of that, and it looks like this is going to be abbreviated for one reason another. Probably the match that is going to be broadcast on MTV. He goes to a reverse chinlock, but Hogan powers right out of it, running him into the corner. Valentine takes him down with forearms, then drops one on him for 2. He gets a body ride, but Hogan gets his knees up. God, Okerlund is terrible. “Valentine hurt his knee!” They struggle over a suplex, with Hogan getting it. Hogan with a shoulder breaker, then a boot, and Valentine falls to the floor. They brawl there, with Hogan getting an atomic drop. I swear to God, if Okerlund says that Hogan weighs 302 pounds again, I’m going strangle myself with my phone charger. Valentine grabs a chinlock on the inside, and Hogan’s arm falls twice, but he fights up. They go back to the floor, and Valentine hits his knee with a chair, but a fan grabs it, so he throws it into the crowd, and grabs another. Valentine starts softening him up for the Figure Four, but Hogan kicks him away a couple of times. Second rope elbow gets 2 for Valentine. He goes up, but Hogan has started to Hulk up, so when Valentine comes off, Hogan clotheslines him and drops the leg for the pin at 10:24. Nothing offensive, and since Hogan had been champion for six months, totally non-formula, because there was no formula. **
WWF World Martial Arts Heavyweight Championship:
Antonio Inoki (champion)
Vs
Charlie Fulton
Inoki is really, really spry at this point in his life, and was probably one of the twenty best wrestlers in the world. He takes Fulton down a few times, and there’s something just inherently wrong with Gene Okerlund calling an Inoki match. Fulton gets some offense in, including a near-fall. He goes to a chinlock, but it’s more of a choke. The ref forces a break, and Inoki gets annoyed and kicks the shit out of him, finishing with the enziguiri for the pin at 3:50. Well, that was quick. *
WWF World Tag Team Championship:
Dick Murdoch & Adrian Adonis (Champions)
Vs
Sgt. Slaughter & Pvt. Terry Daniels
Adonis was such an amazing worker; he just couldn’t keep his weight under control. Murdoch was a pretty good hand, as well, but he was another one who didn’t give a shit what he looked like. Daniels gets a shot at a bit of a shine, working an armbar and getting a takedown or two. Murdoch catches him with a knee to the stomach, but both guys tag out. Slaughter gets a pop to rival Hogan’s. I’ll never understand why he left the company in late-’84 or early ’85. He could have made so much more. Adonis has run out of fucks to give, and is chewing gum in the ring. Daniels controls Adonis briefly, and when Adonis tags in Murdoch, Daniels gets an armdrag and armbar. Gorilla and Gene are really putting over how much Daniels has improved in the last six months. They work in some high spots (including Murdoch with a fucking leapfrog), but eventually Dick takes control. It doesn’t last, as Daniels gets his knees up on a charge and gets another armdrag and armbar. Adonis comes in and gets armdragged as well. Adonis gets a couple of leapfrogs, then a back elbow, but Daniels gets another armbar. Slaughter comes in, and he pounds on Murdoch. Nice spot, as Slaughter puts Daniels on his shoulder then uses the added weight to drop a knee on Murdoch. I like that. Daniels gets an abdominal stretch. Murdoch hip tosses out of it, and they finally get a heat segment on Daniels. Huge powerslam by Adonis. Murdoch gets a hanging armbar, and they cut the ring in half really well to work over Daniels. The heat isn’t long, and Slaughter makes the hot tag. He takes on both guys and after nailing Adonis with the clothesline he locks in the Cobra Clutch. It all breaks down, and Daniels hits a cross body for 2 on Adonis. The ref puts Slaughter out, and Adonis holds Daniels while Murdoch drops a knee to the throat for the pin at 17:16 to retain the titles. Not terrible, and they avoided the face-in-peril formula. ** ¾
WWF Women’s Championship:
The Fabulous Moolah (Champion, with Capt. Lou Albano)
Vs
Wendi Richter (with Cyndi Lauper and David Wolff)
This is essentially a paint-by-numbers Moolah vs anyone she’s ever trained match. Lots of hair whips and a shit like that. It’s really boring, and Moolah is just completely incapable of taking very much of a bump at this point, but she gets caught in the ropes, so Wendi kicks the crap out of her. It takes forever to get her free, and Wendi grabs a full nelson. They tease Cyndi hitting Moolah, and she eventually does. Richter hits a dropkick for 2. Suplex/slam for 2. Backbreaker for 2. Moolah takes back over, and gets a monkey flip for 2. Backdrop gets 2. This is so bad. Moolah pulls her up. Moolah holds her for Albano to hit her, but they totally blow the spot. They go to the worst finish ever, as Moolah does something that vaguely resembles a belly-to-back suplex, but Richter rolls her shoulder at 2 to win the title at 11:20. That was not only bad, it was actively offensive. -***
Gene Okerlund interviews Cyndi and Wendi. Wendi still sounds like Mongo McMichael on helium.
Paul Orndorff
Vs
Chief Jay Strongbow
Always wondered what the big deal was about Strongbow. He was a poor man’s Wahoo McDaniel, and wasn’t particularly strong in the ring. People loved him in the Northeast, though. Kind of like Pedro Morales. Orndorff stalls like crazy after the bell rings. He irritates the shit out of everyone. He takes forever to take his robe off, then to put his elbow pads on. They do some basic stuff and Strongbow grabs a sleeper. Orndorff dumps him over the top. Orndorff pounds on him, but Strongbow no-sells that, hitting chops and kneelifts. Orndorff hits a clothesline for the pin out of nowhere at 6:05. There was about 2 minutes of actual contact. DUD.
Afa
Vs
Rene Goulet
This will be quick. Goulet takes his time getting his gear off, and Afa mauls him. Goulet puts on his loaded glove, but Afa shrugs it off in pretty short order and pummels him more. Goulet gets a clawhold, but Afa escapes with headbutts and finishes him with a Samoan Drop at 3:43. ¼ *
Howard Finkel announces the card for August 25, 1984 at MSG. Looks like a pretty loaded card.
Battle Royal: Sika, Jose Luis Rivera, Butcher Vachon, Antonio Inoki, Tony Garea, Jay Strongbow, Afa, Steve Lombardi, Dick Murdoch, Bob Orton, Adrian Adonis, Rene Goulet, Ron Shaw, Charlie Fulton, Terry Daniels, The Iron Sheik, Tito Santana, Paul Orndorff, Sgt. Slaughter, and Samula
It’s a clusterfuck, because that’s what battle royals are. Lombardi is eliminated by Slaughter. Orndorff is dumped by Santana and Afa. Iron Sheik almost dumps Slaughter, but Daniels makes the save. Strongbow is eliminated. Sheik and Vachon have been eliminated and this camera work is really shitty. Santana eliminates Adonis, who tries to get back in. Slaughter dumps Charlie Fulton. Somehow, Adonis hasn’t been eliminated, so Inoki kicks him in the face. Murdoch, Adonis, and Slaughter all get eliminated at the same time, and we’re down to about ten. Afa gets dumped. Tito gets dumped by Inoki, and Sika is gone as well. Rivera goes too. Inoki backdrops Samula out. It’s Inoki, Garea, Goulet, Shaw, and Orton. Inoki nails Orton with an enziguiri, and he tumbles to the apron and floor. Shaw and Goulet dump Garea, and the jobbers team up against Inoki. Goulet accidentally nails Shaw, eliminating him, and Inoki tosses Goulet to win it. At 13:23. That was a disjointed mess that was impossible to follow because guys kept going in and out. DUD.
The Bottom Line: This was an MSG card with a name on it. Don’t bother. Thumbs down.
